Last summer, Lucy Liu announced that she had welcomed her first child into the world, son Rockwell Lloyd Liu, via gestational surrogacy. At the time, Lucy was an ageless 46 years old, and many people believed that she chose the gestational surrogacy path because of her age, and possibly because of her work schedule, what with starring in an hour-long drama on network television. As it turns out, Lucy says she chose to use a gestational carrier because of work… sort of. Lucy is promoting her work with the Tylenol campaign #HowWeFamily. It’s Tylenol’s campaign to embrace traditional and non-traditional families with more inclusion, respect and representation, I would assume. Lucy gave interviews to Us Weekly and People magazine on behalf of the campaign, and she’s talking more about why she chose the gestational carrier route. Some highlights:
The #HowWeFamily campaign: “I think ‘How We Family’ is about how we as a modern family are connecting now. Whether it’s your gay parents and you’re doing it that way, or you have a child that’s transgender, it’s more about how you love. I think that’s a really wonderful way to support non-traditional families and make what we are doing now what is tradition….People should be inspired and feel comfortable having a family regardless of the fact if they’re not married or if they’re gay or if they’re transgender. It’s not about how you are having your families but how you love your families.”
Why she chose to use a gestational surrogacy: “It just seemed like the right option for me because I was working and I didn’t know when I was going to be able to stop. I decided that was probably the best solution for me, and it turned out to be great. When I finally decided to do it, I had information and asked around about it. And there’s other people who have used gestational carriers, so I had those people to kind of fall back on. I also relied a lot on my doctor who I thought had a lot of input and great insight on everything. It’s amazing the options that are available. There are so many people that have been trying for years, but now because of science there is the opportunity to have children for people who are not fertile at all and for people who are wanting it later in life. It’s just great.”
Rockwell’s best friend is Apple the Dog: “She’s really gentle. She’s protective, too. She’ll sit between him and whoever else comes in just to make sure they don’t step on him. It’s really beautiful to see how they interact.”
Rockwell is happy: “He’s a really happy baby. He’s just really easygoing, and he’s very social and curious. He’s really focused. If he’s going after something — because now he’s crawling — he is focused on it. You can’t distract him. For some reason he’s obsessed with my dog’s toys. He’s teething, and it’s bothering him … He’s given me a great sense of peace and comfort, if that makes any sense. All of the things that they tell you that you’re going to feel emotionally just start sprouting. Everything becomes a wonderful rainbow of delight.”
[From Us Weekly & People Magazine]
Unfortunately, this made me think of the Dylan Lauren story from last year, where Dylan talked about the convenience of having children via gestational surrogate because she was traveling for work. I hope people don’t side-eye Lucy the same way Dylan Lauren was side-eyed. For one, it sounds like Lucy was committed and is still committed to motherhood (whereas Dylan seemed to just agree to parenthood because her husband wanted kids). Lucy is a single mom, and I think what’s being left unsaid is that she was waiting for things in her life to line up – perhaps a husband, pregnancy, etc – and she got to an age where she didn’t want to wait anymore (and couldn’t wait anymore) and just decided to take her own path.
As I’ve said before, no woman is required to explain her fertility issues or why and how she decided to become a mother. It’s none of my business. But I always cringe a little when women make it sound like they chose surrogacy/gestational carriers because pregnancy was inconvenient to their schedules. Maybe that’s my issue, I don’t know.
Photos courtesy of Lucy’s Instagram, WENN.
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